T-RUXX (ruxxpin) wrote,

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let the buttfuckery begin!

At this point, I don't know if I'm going to friend anyone here - I think I might, but hey, maybe I'll just wank to myself here for a zillion years.

So, I've decided that this is my id journal. As in, Freudian id:

According to Freud's psychoanalytic theory of personality, the id is the personality component made up of unconscious psychic energy thatworks to satisfy basic urges, needs, and desires. The id operates based on the pleasure principle, which demands immediate gratification of needs.

A popular interpretation of the id is not that it is "convincing" the mind to ignore social norms, but rather in itself just does not take social norms into account when 'thinking' or 'acting'. The id is the primal, or beast-like, part of the brain, determined to pursue actions that are pleasurable, such as eating or copulation. The prime motive ofthe id is self-survival, pursuing whatever necessary to accomplish that goal.

Hells yes! Man, am I gonna love posting whatever the fuck I want here. Right now I have less than honorable intentions, let me tell you. Fanfic? You know it! Icons? Maybe! Foaming at the mouth lust for Jensen Ackles? Probably. Maybe I'll post my masterful thesis on Jim/Pam. Maybe I'll do picspam of girlcrushes or what I just bought on eBay. Maybe I will max out LJ's patience by ranting for five consecutive entries about how much I fucking hate something (Sera Gamble and Eric Kripke, you're On Notice).

I also want to use this as my NaNoWriMo journal, especially since I could never, ever post about NaNoWriMo to my main journal. People I know in real life read that journal, and my inner writer is tentative at best. It needs nourishing, and a nice big playground free of bullies, peer pressure, and bad crack, know what I mean? For a change, I've decided to be really awesome to myself instead of picking on my writing and thinking about how much I suck all the time. So even though I'll be attempting NaNoWriMo along with others, it'll be more like a mini-NaNoWriMo for me. I've only ever written short pieces, so I feel like setting a goal of 50,000 words for myself is basically setting myself up for failure and frustration; a guarantee that I will not finish what I start and that it will hinder my confidence with writing rather than help it. Instead, my goal is 25,000 words of something I know I can write: hard! core!! porn!!! I don't care if anyone thinks this is cheating or lame. I'm doing this to help myself rediscover how it feels to be in the thick of an engrossing project that brings me joy, not to "win."

As my therapist would say, it's good to have goals.
Tags: hi! my name is:, nanowrimo for dummies
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